Last VJ

Tonight was my last VJ. Ah, my heart breaks for these kids.

Four of "my Bettws girls" from last year have changed so much in even just the last six months. Their hairstyles, make up, language, topic of conversation, and their attitudes. They think they're 25...

VJ is so good for me. It reminds me of the real-life pain in this world that I don't know about. The broken families...oh, so broken. The deaths. The brothers' who are in the hospital for attempting suicide this week. Drugs, drinking, sex, partying...constantly craving attention, approval, affirmation. That room is stuffed full of HUNGER. These kids are hungry for love, for truth, for meaning...

...and they don't even know it.

I don't know what I can do State-side that will remind me like VJ does that my little struggles and "worries" and "fears" in my safe bubble-wrapped world are absolutely infinitesimal. But I need something to remind me.

I have Jesus. He's all that matters in this life. His promises are why I keep going. And its nights like tonight, that my life gets a little perspective.

While at VJ, I usually just can't wait for it to be over. The noise level, breaking up fights, being disrespected to my face, being laughed at...watching Jesus come up on the screen and hearing the kids mock Him...

but when VJ is over, I'm so glad I went. I'm so glad my patient God, by His Holy Spirit, prompted me in my anger, sadness, fatigue and sense of "not knowing what else to do" to pray for these teens. Their souls. They are lost...and just like me, they need Jesus.

Lord, help.