Monday, October 20, 2008

Just another manic Monday

...well, not really.

But it was what I expect will end up being a "typical Monday." The usual run. Always beyond words. A walk to Tescos- our grocery store. (*here, grocery's are specifically fruits and vegetables...they call everything else "food shopping"...) The walk is nice-- its all down hill. What's the killer is the walk BACK...let alone with all the groceries- its over a mile.

I look like a homeless person when I go out of the house on days off. My hat is extremely practical and almost mildly cute when my hair's down...but otherwise...ya, not so hot. Multiple coats ("jumpers"). Gloves. (None of which match...) A massive bag (that Steph got me for my birthday! Thanks, Steph!) and extra grocery bags tied around the outside of it. Man, it is HEAVY.

I kept stopping at bus stops-- but not to wait for the rest my legs and my sholders! It's the strangest feeling...sweating, and freezing at the same time. Oh but I love it. I love walking everywhere. It makes me think of Scripture more...and of analogies about "walking" and "journeying" and "pressing on."

The walk home is literally uphill the entire way- with the exception of a little dip inbetween streets, where then it goes up steeper afterwards. As I was huffing and puffing, Third Day came on my ipod.

And even though the journey is long
and I know the road is HARD
Well, the One who's gone before me-
You will help me carry on

And after all that I've been through
Now I realize the Truth:
That I must go through the valley
To stand upon the mountain of God

The bridge is, "Sometimes I think of where it is I've come from- and the things I've left behind. But all I have and what I posess: nothing can quite compare...with what's in front of me!"

And that's what my heart exclaims. As I CLIMB up the hill (both physically and metaphorically) I hear Him telling me over and over again, "Here I am. I'm with you."

I know it'd be "easier" to have a car. To be able to drive to the grocery store. I know it won't be fun knowing my nephew is being born and I'm over 4,000 miles away. Things here keep breaking- my headphones and my flat iron broke today. Replacing those would be feasible and half the price in America. But...oh, but nothing compares with this! I wouldn't trade it for anything. The lessons I'm learning, the things I'm experiencing, the relationships I'm building (even in the States!)...I see the Savior so much more clearly when things aren't easy. When they're not how I would've chosen them. Ah, and He is so kind. To change my heart-- to make it conform to His will.

Now, THIS is what I chose. I chose this life. Life in Wales. Life at Christchurch. Life in this house. And I don't chose it because, "Well, its just easier to have a positive attitude," but I chose it because HE is the only wise King. And He has not left me! He is here! And I am learning more of Him! Growing closer to Him. Going deeper into the glories of Calvary. His precious blood REDEEMS US! We are FORGIVEN! ALIVE! RESTORED! SET FREE!!! This is precious, precious time. And I'm cherishing it...because it is a season.

I've heard there's a "rumor" spreading around that I'm planning to stay in Wales when my year on the GAP Team is over. I didn't start that rumor. =) I have no idea what God has for me. I'm praying He'll show me what to do and where to go. And He will. My heart has been in Orlando for 3 and a half years...but I don't know if that means I'll ever live there again. I hope to...but what do I know? (The answer is nothing.) I want my life to declare, "Here I am, LORD, send me"...whether that means I stay here, go to Africa, Virginia, Antartica, Florida-- whether I am single forever traveling the globe, or home all day everyday serving a husband and training children, or somewhere in between. This isn't our home anyways, guys. It's all fading away.

Love to you!

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